Ok, so as you can see I started this blog quite a bit of time ago. I actually had a few other posts but looking back - they were lame. So I removed them and am starting over.
I really have no idea where this blog will go or who will ever really read it. Maybe I will open this up to my family so they can understand this journey.
The best place to start is always the beginning.
April of 2009, I was 4 month past being official certified as a CPA (despite the fact I passed the exam 1 year prior - but thats another story), and Chris and I decided it was time - we were ready to expand our family. I stopped taking the pill in April and the plan was to officially start "trying" in July. To be honest I didn't think I would become pregnant that first month, but I didn't think it would be that hard. We all remember 8th grade health class, If you have unprotected sex you will get pregnant!! I now know thats a load of crap. Sure it could happen - but realistically you have a 20% chance every month - big fact that was neglected to be mentioned. Not that I can blame the health teachers - I plan to perpetuate that partial truth to my high school girl scouts and to my children some day.
I had the great support of an amazing message board that I posted on regularly - Trying to get Pregnant (TTGP) on "The bump". I had been Charting regularly. As i said, while I didn't expect it the first month, I certainly thought by October I would be pregnant - and how perfect would it be - I would be on leave during the summer, when I'm on reduced summer hours so my vacation time would last longer and I could hopefully stay out longer. Well October, November and even December came & went. I was starting to worry a little, but hey - It can take a healthy couple up to a year to conceive.
January 2010 rolled around - a new year and a new hope. I recall winter camping with my Girl Scouts and we were on the pond "boot skating" and it was late, almost midnight if I remember correctly and we were stargazing. Across the sky zooms a beautiful shooting star. I made a wish on that star that I would get pregnant that month. Lo and behold on 1/30/10 I take a pregnancy test and it is positive. The line is faint but there. I take 2 more tests - including a digital and all are positive. I was so elated. I knew Chris was nervous but I couldn't wait. My estimated due date was 10/14/10 - how perfect! half way between my birthday and Chris's birthday, everything was as I wanted. We went to our second appointment on March 9, 2010. At this appointment we had a growth scan scheduled. As I lay on the table there was this beautiful butterfly mobile hanging over head. The NP begins the ultrasound and this is when my world came crashing down. I had seen enough 8/9wk ultrasound pictures on The bump to know what I should be seeing and I wasn't seeing it. There was no heartbeat, and I was measuring about 5 1/2 weeks pregnant, even though I was 8 wks. I knew then it was over. I had 2 more ultrasounds and blood work done. My beta level was still very high (over 10K). As my body was not getting the program I opted to have a D&C. On March 19 I had the D&C.
I was heartbroken, some days I think I still am. I know I never saw a heartbeat, never felt any movement, nor had a baby to hold, but I was pregnant - I had a baby and then I didn't. And I was sad. 3 months went by before we were allowed to start trying again and we did. I knew if I was pregnant by the time my EDD rolled around it would make it a little easier. The months rolled by - summer passed, then fall, Christmas and New Years. I remember thinking "here I am a year after seeing that shooting star and I have gotten no where." I recalled that wish - I only wished to get pregnant - I didn't state the obvious of having a baby to take home. I thought it was implied.
Tax season passed and before I knew it - we had been trying for 1 year since the m/c. It had been 2 years since we decided to expand our family and we were no closer. We made an appointment with my OB and they ordered some tests - blood work for me and a semen analysis for Chris. My blood work was fine but the SA wasn't as good. The main issue is motility ( sperm moving in a forward progressive motion) only 25% of the boys were moving. The rest were immobile or dead. Chris was hurt. I remember wishing it was me and not him. I knew I could handle it better. After some discussion we decided to repeat the SA and move on to specialists. Chris made an appointment with a urologist and I made an appointment with both of us with a Reproductive Endocrinologist(RE). the Uro appointment is still pending.
The repeat SA was better 100 million sperm - 37% motility. The first meeting with the RE was great. They spelled everything out for us as to all the procedures they do, what the Dr. recommended for us and went over all the insurance items. First step was an ultrasound for me (yay internal ultrasound). The ultrasound indicated I had cystic ovaries - a sign of PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome) which would most likely be the cause of my irregular cycles (28 days to 48 days). Next up is the HSG & SGH - assuming I don't get a natural BFP(big fat positive) this cycle. I call on CD 1 and get the test scheduled.
After the HSG cycle - again assuming no natural BFP - will be our first medicated cycle. The plan is CD 3 bloodwork and ultrasound, and then 100mg of Clomid (Clomiphene) CD 3-7. Ultrasound again CD 10-12. If the medication works and causes me to grow follicles - earlier than usual is the hope and more than 1 is good too, I will be given the ok to "Trigger" (give myself a shot of HCG) to cause my body to ovulate 36hrs later. 36hrs after the trigger will be the IUI (interuterine insemination). The procedure skips the lower part of the female anatomy and deposit the sperm at the top of the uterus. From there hopefully the sperm meets the egg, everything develops properly and then we end up with a take home baby. From the IUI until either I have a negative HPT or until i'm 12weeks I get to use crinone (Progesterone supplement). If not - rinse and repeat.
If you read this whole post - you rock! I intend to update a little more regularly with the procedures and tests. And maybe some other items that may interest me.
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